Friday, June 5th, 2009
The Proust Questionnaire
Proust on his deathbed.
I needed to write a bio for the “Sean K. Robb” page of this site and really didn’t feel like it. So instead I completed The Proust Questionnaire, a short Q&A found on the last page of every issue of Vanity Fair.
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
To revel in sin followed by absolution.
What is your greatest fear?
That I may be wrong. Conversely, that I may be right.
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Complacency.
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Cruelty.
Which living person do you most admire?
My mother and father.
What is your greatest extravagance?
My large and ridiculous collection of pro wrestling action figures, DVDs and memorabilia.
What is your current state of mind?
Nervous but content.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Faith.
On what occasion do you lie?
Only when it is absolutely necessary to protect my reputation or that of someone close to me.
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
I would like bigger shoulders.
Which living person do you most despise?
Though I despise the existence of all sorts of people (child murderers, war criminals, people who boast of not owning a television, etc) I can’t think of anyone I truly despise as an individual.
What is the quality you most like in a man?
Intelligence, creativity and wit.
What is the quality you most like in a woman?
Courage, inquisitiveness and wit.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
I swear more often than I would like.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
There are too many.
When and where were you happiest?
There was a weekend in New York that comes to mind, but I am frequently quite happy.
Which talent would you most like to have?
I have always wanted to sing. Well, I mean.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
That I worked harder, more diligently and with a greater sense of purpose.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
That I have accepted and grown to love myself.
If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
A house cat.
Where would you most like to live?
Amsterdam or New York City.
What is your most treasured possession?
My ragdoll Lester which I have had since I was 1.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Terrible guilt.
What is your favorite occupation?
To write, to create, to entertain and provoke.
What is your most marked characteristic?
I’m a pretty funny guy. Also, nice eyes.
What do you most value in your friends?
Loyalty, insight, generosity and the ability to make me laugh.
Who are your favorite writers?
Martin Amis, David Foster Wallace, J.D. Salinger and Christopher Hitchens.
Who is your hero of fiction?
Spider-Man and/or Don Draper.
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
I am unprecedented.
Who are your heroes in real life?
Russ Meyer, Barack Obama, Mick Foley.
What are your favorite names?
Veronica, Alex.
What is it that you most dislike?
Religion. Bigotry.
What is your greatest regret?
That I have any regrets at all.
How would you like to die?
Quickly and without warning.
What is your motto?
“You gotta have goals.”
